i'm an island.

i'm totally going to quote paramore when i say that "i'm content with a life of loneliness."cheesy, i know. at least most days i am. today was probably one of the better days i have had in a while but on this cold and snowy night, i can't help but miss the feeling of knowing i belong to someone and that someone belongs to me. i've always been the single girl, out of my circle of friends, i've always been the friend who is kind of in a relationship but never the one truly happy in one. it just really made me wonder, what if it's not the men that i meet that is the problem, what if it's me? maybe i'm just so broken and derailed that maybe it scares people away.on the other hand, the times that i have been truly fixed and better, i was too happy and focused on myself that i didn't want anyone. i have been told that i am hard to get to know. my very best friend told me that i'm just a very complex person with many many layers. why can't i be just simple and permeable? this drives me nuts. this concludes my pathetic rambling. tomorrow is a new day and i'm going to do me.